Let's take a quick glimpse at exactly what must be done for teams to qualify, or, in the case of others not heading in to the last round of matches. MORNING-- Argentina V.s. Nigeria
It's firmly established that Lionel Messi is the savior of Argentinian hopes and dreams, but you have to wonder if anyone else can do it. Argentina's booked into the next round but Nigeria isn't...if the Argentine's use the match to rest Messi and warm up his understudies for a 2nd round run, the Super Eagles could spring a surprise (or at least grab a point) and move on as well. Iran V.s. Bosnia-Herzegovina
The Iranian dream lives on. But it all depends on how they fare against the already ousted Bosnians. Bad luck and missed calls have stymied the debutantes at the cup, but they could easily take this match and spoil the Iranians hopes and dreams...OR...Carlos Quieroz could finally find the cojones to draw up some specific plays for Reza Goochenajad and try to grab the full three points, putting pressure on Nigeria to definitely get the win (as goal differential only barely favors the Africans)
AFTERNOON-- France V.s. Ecuador
Les Blus have looked absolutely dominant for most of their tournament so far...but they are French and it could all slip away in rapid fashion of Ecuador trounces them and Switzerland trounces Honduras. That might take some doing (especially given the sputtering offenses of their rivals) but never bet against the French disaster. Ecuador likely can't be confident in just taking a point as Switzerland has looked far better than Honduras thus far, and La H is already packing it in.
Switzerland V.s. Honduras
With Honduras eliminated they can do one of two things: a) roll over and play dead letting the Swiss steamroll them and head on to the next round, or b) play the same ugly, aggressive, haphazard brand of futbol they've played before, and force the Swiss to sneak a point or two en route to making the next round. Basically, everything's coming up Swiss.
It was a near perfect day of futbol. Thrilling matches that were extremely close throughout, open thrilling style, and the bright sunshine actually drew me out of my game watching hidy-hole and got me to socialize with other fans in the bright sun. So we'll sneak in an extra substitution, just for fun...
FIRST: ON--Nomad World Pub--I'm proud of my Montanan roots, and my Montanan-isms, and generally all things Montanan, but I'd be hard pressed to find a place like the Nomad World Pub with the live music from around the world, a vast array of domestic and imported beer, a willingness to experiment with different drinks, and a great venue to crowd around with all manner of fans. This is the kind of thing that we need to pull people in to the wonderful world of futbol. Thank you for being awesome Nomad, and thank you for supporting it Minnesota United...spread the word and bring in the people. ON: Lionel Messi...Argentine Savior--For all the gushing about Argentina's attacking options, it's really been Messi or bust, today it took one of the great strikes of the tournament to get them past Iran and book their ticket for the second round. Let's just go ahead and own it next match Argentina, put ten guys in goal and let Messi do what he does up top. OFF: Iran Jokes--It's a remarkable thing, but Iran seems to have become the darling of the World Cup, sure they don't do much attacking, and their style of defense is best described as "massive", but we love an underdog. So, getting my haircut, the barbers were intrigued by their style. Hanging out with other fans, even Argentine's were hoping to see a miracle strike groaning with each Goochenajad miss. So, come on Iran, give up your nuclear program and send one guy on loan to the MLS...we'll be your best buds...for a couple months at least.
ON--The Ayew Boys--Abedi Pele is not the Pele you've heard of, but he is the omnipresent legend of Ghanaian football. His sons, Andre and Jordan were tremendous for the Black Stars today in one of the most impressive results in the federation's history. Andre (aka Dede) nodded home the crucial equalizer that put Germany on the back foot, and Jordan's daring runs at the end of the match kept neutral fans entranced even as die hards worried about counterattacks. OFF--The Boateng Boys--The run up to the match was concerned primarily with the second civil war of Jerome and Kevin-Prince Boateng. Unfortunately that was completely anti-climactic. Niether made good touches, there was little creation or strong passing from either and the game opened up and was far more exciting when they were subbed out at half time. Heck! Kevin even gave Mesut Ozil a better hug than his brother! ON--Africa--It's been an underwhelming ten days for African sides, but today things turned around clearly and decisively, with Ghana stunning Germany and Nigeria holding off Bosnia. Vincent Enyema's gone so far as to position himself as keeper of the tournament. Whether or not they can get a team (or two...or--in an ideal circumstance--four) through to the next round remains to be seen, but they aren't nearly the pushover one would have thought OFF--The Baltics--Bosnia had a decisive moment for Edin Dzeko wiped away by a linesman's bad call, but he also missed a parcel of other opportunities en route to the debutantes getting bounced out of the cup. They're not alone, the Croatians are clinging to life in Group A, and the Serbian referee of today's Argetnina-Iran match missed an obvious foul in the box that might have us singing a far different tune about Mr. Messi (or maybe not).
America's fixation on two of the premier matches in the group stage made this a day to circle on the calendar But know that the day is past, it's worth reflecting on exactly how things panned out, both for the good and the bad. ON: Thomas Muller--The first (official hat trick) of the cup came against an unlikely rival, but the German execution did what it has always been designed to do--destroy anything that gets in its way. Even one of the top 5 teams in the world. OFF: Pepe--Stupidity, thy name is Pepe. Sure Muller's dive to the ground in supposed "eye-gouge" agony was frustrating, but harassing, intimidating and finally headbutting solves absolutely nothing If there's one consolation, it's that all the mockery of his moronic decision may push young players to never, under any circumstances imitate him. ON: Carlos Quieroz--The Portugese mastermind had a clear cut strategy, distract and frustrate the Nigerian attack at every turn, stack players in the box until there's no way through and make the most of a little mistake. Holding on to that strategy in the face of the Super Eagles early gains served Team Melli very well. And while I think they could well have grabbed a win a little more focus in building out of the midfield, a point for a team widely critiqued as the worst in the field is awfully promising. OFF: Stephen Keshi--The first African manager to take his home nation to a world cup (beating Ghana's James Appiah by 3 hours) did himself no favors by refusing to alter strategy in the face of quality defense. When attacking up the middle didn't work, he had defenders boom the ball...down the middle...and then do it again...and again...One of the ugliest performances of the cup so far, bodes ill for the next matches. ON: Tim Howard--TIMMY! was the saving grace of a spotty American back field tonight. Every time the final four ceded an inch of space, a thunderous cross or shot was rocketing into the box. Time after time, Timbo saved the day. Sure Dede Ayew equalized (courtesy of a brilliant Gyan back heel), but most other keepers at the cup would have folded long before that moment. There are questions about the American defense...but not the man between the posts. OFF: Ghana's Mojo--I've travelled to Ghana a couple times now. I take pride in speaking a local dialect, and know that my back up World Cup squad is most definitely the Black Stars. I also know that Ghana believes in a certain kind of swagger, a particular form of magic, and they use it to their advantage to never ever play intimidated in a match. It threw off the last two American squads who underestimated the rival...but it ran out today. Whether or not it comes back in time for Germany is a major question.
Tomorrow I go back to work with a day long teacher training. So Belgium/Algeria and Brazil/Mexico may not hit my radar. Sill and all, I'll be glad to catch up as soon as I can.
It was a great way to spend father's day, a bowl of Cheeto's in one hand, a Sella Artois in the other and the sight of futbol, glorious futbol on the tele. Here's the big themes from a wonderful Sunday in the Park. ON: Swiss Grit--Record setting as it was, the stoppage time goal was a great bit of luck for Switzerland, stealing a win from the jaws of defeat, and announcing that they will not be the poster child for stupid FIFA rankings everyone assumes they will. OFF: Ecuadorian Defense--That final goal that has the internet raving, it was definitely a stroke of skill, but also a stroke of luck that Ecuador, on missing their chance looked so lackadaisical and foolish in challenges aimed to stop the attack, but not following through with the action to actually grab the draw. They'll need a result against France for any shot at the knockout rounds, and they can't defend like that (witness what happened to Honduras).
ON: Karim Benzema--The frenchman has a legitimate case to claim a hat trick (FIFA rules would suggest that the deflection off the keeper doesn't become an own goal since it rebounded off the post). He was THE Frenchman on the pitch, and looked every bit a world beater. OFF: Wilson Palacios--Speaking of beater's, the Honduran midfielder seems to have some sort of axe to grind with Paul Pgoba. Hacking, grabbing and finally shoving him at every opportunity. Beyond looking ugly and unsportsmanlike, it leaves him out of the next match against Ecuador, and deprives Honduras of one of their best creators. ON: Lionel Messi--The Atomic Flea made one of the most beautiful, gif-able, twitter-breaking able runs of this or any cup. Making opponents look foolish and striking a solid goal to seal the deal for Argentina OFF: "Lionel Messi"--The idea that Messi can do it alone seems to have slipped into everyone's head, even Messi. No doubt, his great goal was the difference, but it was only the difference because Argentina luckily evaded Bosnian threat after threat. Every member of Albiceleste's attacking squadron seemed fixated on doing it themselves, the result--60 minutes of enervating, blase futbol that should have ended far worse than it did. Come on Leo, don't try to do it all yourself.
Nickname: The Super Eagles typify the high flying (and oft swooping) Nigerian style. Capable of great things, capable of stupid things, otherwise utterly unpredictable.
Star: The midfield maestro of Nigeria's hopes and dreams is undoubtably John Obi Mikel. Genius play at the age of 20 made him a highly sought commodity at the top levels in England. His time at Chelsea has been quietly consistent, though never at the levels of staggering brilliance one might have anticipated, he's unquestionably a heart and soul player on a team that needs it.
Hip-Star: Mikel needs men to drive in the goals--and while most eyes up top will tend towards the prolific Emmanuel Emenike and Liverpool's up-and-comer Victor Moses, we think the "real" soccer fan will plump for Ahmed Musa whose under the radar work at CSKA Moscow has steeled him to work against the best in the world (Champions League), and in less than comfortable conditions (Russia). He may not start, he may not see much pitch, but focusing on his performance will be like focusing on the best cinematography in Nollywood movies.
X-Factor: Having landed a group that the other African nations would dearly love to have, the weight of expectations may land rather heavily on Nigeria. Though they seem to have the clearest path through the group stages, one might have said the same thing in 2010, but the Super Eagles got bupkus instead. Lower ambitions made for better results in 1994 and again at the Cup of Nations last February, how much we expect versus how much they can deliver is the biggest question ahead.
Keshi (R) back in the glory days)
Coach: Local boy Stephen Keshi makes for an interesting example. Unlike most other managers he has only ever held positions with national teams, never denigrating himself with a daily grind of League competition. He's had great success in qualification (having pushed Togo through in 2006), but on the big stage his work has yet to be seen.
History: One of the titans of African football, Nigeria's best years were in their back-to-back final sixteen finishes in 1994 and 1998. They even won their group both times, playing a sterling brand of football that's far less common among the green & white these days.
Food: Tempted as I am to try fried ground peanuts (Kuli-Kuli) I'll play it a little healthier with Egusi offers a hearty soup with a mix of beef, shrimp, pumpkin and spinach.
Goodluck getting rid of that smile
Fool: The only president whose name is an implicit offer of support Goodluck Jonathan makes the most of his name to feel well liked even when he's mucking it all up. This is the man who attempted to ban his own team from international competition (before FIFA attempted to do it themselves). And since then the hits have just kept coming: ignoring terrorist cells, sacking independently minded ministers, shrugging off pleas of greater representation from Northern constituents, and playing totally dumb about the abduction of 100 school girls by an aforementioned terror cell. At this point his hat's about the only good thing about him--and that owes more to Pharrell than to Goodluck.
Best Case: Keeper Vincent Enyema thinks they can/should make the semi-finals. Let's see how it happens: Topping Bosnia and Iran gives them second place and a shot at the overconfident French (winnable) and, let's guess, a worn down/overconfident Portugal. That would get them the semi's...but it owes more to the draw than their talent.
Worst Case: A poor showing against Iran incites muslims and enrages President Jonathan, leading to feuds at home. The team continues to fumble chances against Bosnia as the home front burns and a final drubbing 7-0 by Argentina leaves them in utter shambles in every sense of the word.
My prediction: Nigeria was my first favorite from Africa, and they certainly have resources to make themselves a constant threat both on the continent and worldwide. Unfortunately, while the officially biggest GDP on the continent gives them a wealth of resources, this will be the cup, with a poor performance in a manageable group, that sees their sun set, and a chaotic government send them into a tailspin thereafer. 4th Place--0 points Added Bonus: On their names alone we have to like the stable of artists in the label Chocolate City's loopy crew (particularly Ice Prince, Jesse Jagz and our chosen artists Str8Buttah...). Bravo Chocolate City, keep this going.
Nickname: Team Melli is not a pro-muppet meme...it's the common nickname (meaning just "The National Team"), others like "The Lions of Persia," but Melli almost sounds cute, just the thing for a shockingly strident Iranian squad.
The Gooch
Star: The fastest rising star in the Iranian futbol firmament is easily Reza Goochannejhad. Formerly a Dutch junior international, his swap to the Melli, has paid off with 9 goals in 11 caps. Boosted from the Belgian league up to Charlton Athletic, he's the closest thing to Iranian legend Ali Daei as we're likely to see for a while.
Hip-Star: While the Iranians have mostly given into the fad of foreign bred/based players, there are still those who practice and train year round in the Persian sands. Notably a hard-nosed, veteran, localized defense that allowed just seven goals and did it all without the precious fanfare of international media. The heir to the defensive throne is unquestionable Ehsan Hajsafi, who debuted for the national team at 18 and has been a stalwart since...not that you would know him, obviously.
X-Factor: Famously isolationist you have to wonder just how Iranians will deal with this decidedly foreign-flavored team. Sure there have been moves to globalize Iran's standing in the world, thanks in no small part to president Hassan Rohani, but there's just as much desire to pull away and prove an imperial dominance in the region that a diasporic team can't do. So are players going for the glory of sporting dominance, or the mother land?
They don't seem to isolationist to Carlos
Coach: After some ill advised dalliances as a head man in New York and the UAE, Carlos Quieroz refined his skills under the tutelage of Sir Alex Ferguson. A trip to South Africa with Portugal was unsatisfying for those in Lisbon, but those in Tehran salivated at the chance to sign him up. Who cared if Portugal only scored against North Korea? Iran, needed defense, and Quieroz has provided all that and more. Whether or not it pays off in Brazil has yet to be seen.
History: The team's best glory days (when they dominated Asia from 1968-1976) are long gone, but they have made a habit of being a thorn in the sides of others, drawing with Scotland in 1978, beating the hated US in 1998 and bedeviling Mexico for 45 minutes in 2006. Who they foil this time will depend on just how long they last.
Food: Continuing my quasi-vegetarian kick, I'm curious to try out Kuku, a combination of eggs, greens and herbs...or really, just herbs with a little egg to hold it all together. Persian fritatta, bring it on.
Fool: I'm an American, so what would this post be without a shot at the Ayatollah Ali Khameni who avoids all the hassle of engaging in debate, preferring to "correct" mistakes of elected officials whenever the mood strikes. Good luck selling that one to FIFA refs.
Best Case: The defense is as good as advertised, stifling the entirety of Group F long enough for Goochannejhad to knock in a couple for at least one win and a stunning berth in the second round. That's where they wrong foot an overconfident France and hold Ronaldo scoreless for 60 minutes in the quarterfinals before the golden boy takes his revenge on his old boss.
Worst Case: Both the defense and the counterattacks are left on the Copa Cabana beaches where the newly liberated national team sees thongs as a blessing rather than a curse. Washing out with zero points, no one goes back to Iran, and all of John Kerry's work on a nuclear deal goes *pfft*
My prediction: Call me crazy...[pauses to be called crazy] but having followed Asian qualifying closely, I was impressed at the defense of Iran. As much focus as goal scoring gets, the World Cup is often a war of attrition, and few sides are better suited to that war than Iran. I think Carlos Quieroz's crew won't score much though "Gooch" will help, but they'll let in even less, and with a divided Nigeria and inexperienced Bosnia, I have them as my second shock team in the next round. (France will eat them alive...but hey...it's a good run) Round of 16 (2nd in Group--6 points) Added Bonus: For a group that owes their musical genre to American Hip-Hop, Zedbazi sure does a fine job of admonishing us, here's their offering to the World Cup of Hip Hop "Irooni e LA" (Iranian in LA)
Nickname: They have two nicknames, "Zmajevi" or Dragons, is a solid "FEAR OUR POWER" nickname, but the more notable one "Zlatni Ljiljani" means the far less intimidating "Golden Lilies"
"For My Homeboys"
--rough translation from the Bosnian
Star:Edin Džeko strikes for Man City (though mostly off the bench) and drives the whole offense. He isn't as widely known as the other prolific goal scorers coming into the tournament, but as someone rumored to be worth 20 Million Euro, he's got every opportunity to get a wider appeal for himself.
Hip-Star: Don't get sucked in by that corporate "goal scoring wins games" malarkey. And don't let just the mainstream keeper fixation rule your sense of defense of prowess--root instead for up-and-coming defender Ognjen Vranješ. The youngest and most lock-down defender Bosnia has to offer. He may look like a bro, but we'll claim him for the cause of hipsters everywhere.
X-Factor: Getting set for the World Cup is all about preparing yourself for the level of competition you'll face. Bosnia sends about six players into the world class leagues of Europe and Champions level competition (including Džeko, his fellow striker Ibišević, Midfielders Pjanić and Lulić, Defender Spahić and keeper Begović). Everyone else will get their most consistent taste of regular play against world class players in Brazil--if they rise to the challenge they can surprise, if they don't...well...
He can be a part-time-model
Coach: Continuing a long line of excellent Balkan coaches, Safet Sušić has led the Dragon/Lilies with aplomb in his 5 years in charge. Building off a stellar--if less reknowned career--where he was voted the greatest player in Paris Saint-Germain history and lauded by UEFA, FIFA and fellow studs like Gerd Muller. He's basically the Hip-Star version of player turned coach if you want to show off against people touting Klinsmann, Wilmots and Deschamps.
History: Bosnia/Herzegovinia is the only debutante in this year's field. After years of playoff loses (largely to Portugal) they're in the field and the papers for something other than tragic deaths related to hooliganism or road accidents.
Food: We're firm believers in the philosophy that, if it's fried meat, it's good sports food. So we're looking forward to trying Ćevapi combining delicious sausages with onions and pita bread instead of a bun. Well done Bosnia, well done.
Fool: Lost in all the "Russia's-Going-Retro-Bond-Villain" in Eastern European news this spring is a host of February riots in Bosnia protesting terrible services, lack of employment, growing poverty and political dismissal of the issues. The violence from February has died down but the demonstration continues, so unless you want withering derision from a blog with four readers you best get your sh*t together, Prime Minister Nermin Nikšić.
Best Case: Džeko leads the way out of the group stages and on to the quarter finals with a couple of superlative strikes to unseat a lackadaisical French team in the second round--ensuring peace at home and respect around the world.
Worst Case: Džeko struggles to break through world class defenses, his teammates play in awe of their surroundings, the only goal scored is an own goal and ethnic divisions within the team mirror increasing unrest at home.
My prediction: Edin Džeko will get a stunning first goal to scare Argentina in the first match (before a less experienced midfield gives way), and he'll lead a strong showing against Nigeria. But faced with the shut down defense of Carlos Quieroz's Iran, I think they'll quaver, showing their inexperience and sealing a trip home early, despite inspiring some confidence at home. 3rd Place in group--3 points Added Bonus! Bosnia's Entry in the World Cup of Hip Hop: Buba Corelli "Oh No"
Nickname:La Albiceleste (The White and Sky Blue) isn't exactly fearsome, intimidating or the least bit interesting, but it is uh...accurate...wait no...that's a navy kit...screw it.
Star: Here's one of the four names that American sports fans of all stripes would be hard pressed NOT to know already: Lionel Messi aka "The New Maradona", aka "La Pulga Atomica/The Atomic Flea". To put it simply: he's good, really good, probably the best player in the world, and has been for the last 6 years or so. He creates, he finishes and he has arguably the biggest target on his back of any player in the world, along with the crushing expectations associated with it. He was great as a distributor in South Africa, will the pressure to score push him faster than he needs?
Hip-Star: Obviously, everybody knows about Messi, and only poseurs would really think that Sergio Agüero or Gonzalo Higuaín aren't totally mainstream too. If you really want to show your awesomeness, Ezequiel Lavezzi who would be the top threat if it weren't for the three sell-outs ahead of him. The PSG striker can hang with the big guns, and makes an awesome threat off the bench.
Romero can't believe he's the
weak link either
X-Factor: There's no real concern with what the Argentinians are going to do offensively, and in their relatively anemic group, there's little worry that they'll be fine until the knockout rounds. But that's the point where goal keeping form will suddenly matter. Sergio Romero, the most trusted Argentine keeper isn't seeing much of the pitch at Monaco, and the others (Mariano Andújar,Augustín Orión and Óscar Ustari) are either older, far less familiar with international competition or both. The goals allowed against the likes of Iran, Nigeria and Bosnia/Herzegovinia may be telling in how they handle tougher outs like France, Ecuador or Switzerland.
Coach:Alejandro Sabella lacks a few things the last man to guide Argentina to the world cup had: international fame, a history of dating Madonna, a total lack of self control. But the phlegmatic new coach has been valuable to Argentina in a way the old guy (what was his name...Mara-donda?) didn't. Going undefeated against an increasingly ominous South American competition, and forging a firm bond with the maestro named Messi.
History: A pair of titles in 1978 and 1986 are the dominant laurels of Maradonna and Kempes' golden generation. Since they bowed out, however, they haven't made it past the quarterfinals. For all the furor around Messi and co, they need a little more hardware before they rank among the legends in local lore.
Breakfast with Argentina--
This on toast.
Food: With so many games being played in the afternoon, and lunch being the biggest meal of the day in Argentina the prospect of a couple empanadas and a cake with dulce du leche sounds great, though I'm not sure it could help me stay awake...I know, a glass of Malbec! No way that'll make me sleepy.
Fool:Christine Fernandez de Kirchner offers something of a cautionary tale for any politically astute wife of a former president (not that we know anyone like that). Sure she's got two terms, but she also has a rotten economy and a ceaseless run of corruption scandals to inspire protests against her. On the plus side, Pope Francis is both Argentinian and a futbol fan, so God might be on their side, even if political reliability isn't.
Best Case: Messi runs circles around everyone, and dismantles Cristiano Ronaldo in a quarter, Mario Balotelli in the semi, and Neymar in the final to add a third star to the AFA crest.
Worst Case: A freak samba accident breaks La Pulga Atomica's leg, and the despondant teammates sleepwalk to a stunning run of ties that leave them just short of the out rounds.
My prediction: While Edin Dzeko and Bosnia might sneak a point in the first match, Sergio Romero should get back into form throughout the group stage, and can probably handle the second round rival (likely Switzerland or Ecuador). The quarters is where things get interesting, and while I think they make the semi's, I don't think they go any further than that. 4th Place Added Bonus: Our Argentine representives in the Hip-Hop world Cup are Koxmoz
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